Imagine my shock as a neurodivergent teen when I first realized that using large vocabulary and eloquent speech doesn’t make you less likely to be misinterpreted, rather it adds an entirely new layer of misinterpretation I had never even realized existed in the form of people thinking you’re being snobbish or condescending when you’re just trying to be specific
There’s certain benign activities that you should do even if someone is judging you because the sort of person who would judge you for doing that isn’t a person worth listening to.
Worried about wearing that pikachu shirt when you usually don’t wear t-shirts? Do it. The sort of person who would judge you for wearing a pikachu shirt isn’t worth your time.
Worried someone will judge you for eating in public? What sort of idiot cares about another person eating a salad at the park? Just do it.
Worried you’re not dressed well enough for this mall? It’s a mall. If someone judged you for showing up in basketball shorts they have too much time on their hands.
What sort of person gets mad at someone else just standing to the side and reading a nutrition label? Not the sort of person I’d like to meet.
Someone judging you for not wearing makeup? That person is not worth your time.
This mindset has helped my social anxiety a lot btw. As long as you generally do your best to be a polite person other normal or slightly weird or out of character things you do are your business. The sort of person paying a lot of attention to every little thing a stranger does generally isn’t the sort of person whose opinion you’d respect. So stop letting their opinions matter to you when you haven’t even met them.
It’s good to encourage people sometimes if they want encouragement. But sometimes, if someone says they can’t do something, it’s better to say “that’s okay” and take them at their word. Sometimes we really can’t do something. Sometimes our disability stops us. The narrative that “you can do anything you can put your mind to” can cause harm in some cases. The truth is, some of us just can’t do certain things. Sometimes we can’t do them some of the time. And sometimes they are things we can never do. And that’s okay. We need to learn that sometimes what people need is acceptance and a reminder that they’re worthy, regardless of whatever they can and can’t do.
